Blogmas #25 // Merry Christmas

Hi everyone! I hope you are all having a peaceful and joyful holiday.

I cannot fathom the idea that I posted for 25 consecutive days. For a newbie like me, this accomplishment is quite the feet. Granted, some posts held more time and attention than others, but I still attempted and posted.

Congrats to everyone who participated in blogmas. And to all those who took the time to read, like and respond to my posts, thank you. I appreciate you.

The other day, I received a notification from WordPress that I received 1,000 likes and 150 followers. I don’t share this blog actively, so the idea of getting responses and support from people I’ve never met, warms and lights my heart, especially during this dark time.

Merry Christmas WordPress family.

Blogmas #22 // Giving Tuesday

About six years ago, I experienced my first giving Tuesday with YouTube Influencer and home chef Laura Vitale. I was selected from hundreds of applicants to join Laura on a virtual cooking event where we cooked and conversed together via google hangout. Obviously this was way before COVID, so a virtual event of this kind was very unique.

I bring this experience up because since then, I have donated to a cause, non- profit or organization/ person in need every season. Over the past few years I’ve donated to meals for children, ending sex traffic, local businesses, book launches, and more. This year I focused on PAWA- Philippine American Writers and Artists. I chose this non-profit this holiday season because they have offered me so much space and support as a budding writer.

To begin with, since the pandemic, I have attended at least a related PAWA virtual event once a month, if not more. I attend classes, panel discussions and have even participated in several readings as a special guest. PAWA is a community in which I belong in and a few years ago I didn’t think I could be in such regarded company. Since my involvement with PAWA I have met some amazing people and writers and have greatly benefited from their guidance and support. Many of them have encouraged me to take the next step with my stories, but I don’t think, even with their vote of confidence, that I am ready to share my writing with the world.

PAWA provides the necessary space for me to feel held, with no judgment, no pretense, no vex. The community is one that welcomes all writers and artists and encourages each person at their own pace and trajectory.

I know this is a season of giving, but this year is fiscally challenging for many. I know there are a lot of causes and organizations that need support, but if you can help PAWA in any way, I encourage you to do so. During this pandemic, if you have relied on books, art, movies, music or any form of creative expression made by a Filipino American, to provide escape, entertainment or enlightenment during this very dark time, then I encourage you to donate to PAWA. They support writers and artists to continue to do this work so that we can all benefit from these enriching experiences.

For more on PAWA.. click below…

http://pawainc.com/

Blogmas #21 // Christmas Star

There are times during this pandemic that seem hopeless and despairing. Yet, there are moments, especially today when we experience the polar opposite. Today, my husband and I hiked our usual trail — Lime Ridge Trail Head in Concord, California. The hike takes us roughly 2 hours to complete, depending on how slow or fast we approach the incline. Today, we sped our pace because we anticipated when the sun would set.We wanted to be able to have enough light to traverse back to our car. Yet we needed it to be dark enough to see the Christmas Star.

The Christmas Star, or more appropriately the conjunction, took place tonight about an hour after the sun set. The conjunction is when Jupiter and Saturn appear closely aligned in the sky that it’ll look like a double planet. To me, they looked like they were kissing. The last time this happened took place in the Middle Ages. The next time this will happen will be 2080 and then again on 2400.

It’s amazing how when we’re in need of a good omen, especially when we are all experiencing a pandemic, all we have to do is look up at the sky and witness a celestial miracle. Years and decades from now, I can say that in my lifetime, I survived a pandemic but also watched as Jupiter and Saturn could been seen on the cold winter solstice night, seemingly with the naked eye. What a time to be alive!

Your top 3 in an emergency?

For the past few days, my hometown Fairfield, CA has been burning, literally. The LNU Lightning Complex Fire was caused by the thunder and lightning storm that occurred over the weekend. Many structures and homes were burned; I even heard a National Park in Santa Cruz was severely damaged. My parents’ neighborhood was evacuated and schools were closed for the rest of the week. My in-laws, although their neighborhood was not evacuated, but for safety precautions, stayed with me and my hubby for the last two nights. As I was helping my mother-in-law unload her car, I noticed the personal items and essentials she packed in a hurry. In one bag, she had her heirloom jewelry, another bag held a small statue of Mother Mary and another bag held medication and food. It dawned on me, if I were put in a similar situation, what would I bring? Here are my top three:

  1. My computer or journal because I need to write. Since I’ve revived this blog, I’ve had the urge to write more than I have ever felt compelled to. It doesn’t matter to me if people read, like or respond to my post. I like the idea that I can read my thoughts at any particular time in my life. It’s been great to share this public journal with y’all! 
  2. A book because besides writing, I enjoy reading. It’s my escape. Especially when I’m feeling a mood, and I need to be lifted by words, there’s nothing like sinking into a good book and circumventing reality. 
  3. Running shoes because no matter where I’m at, I need to physically escape. Sometimes we take for granted what a brisk walk or jog can do for the mind, body and soul. This is  something I’ve learned while sheltering in place. When I’m feeling overwhelmed and writing and reading won’t suffice, I’ll put on my shoes and hop on the treadmill or head outside. Getting the body to move, even for a little bit restores and revives the dormant energy in our bodies. 

I imagine that I’d pack more in my emergency bag. But if I had to choose three items, these would be my priority. Unlike my mother in law who packed crucial things like food and Mother Mary, my bag probably wouldn’t be as practical. I don’t know how long I’d last in an emergency situation with shoes, my blog and hella books in my backpack, but at least I’ll have all the things I love around me. 

What about you? What are your three essentials?

 

Mama Said Knock You Out

Just like anything important in your life, if you let it fall to the wayside, it’s even harder to come back. Admittedly, I have done that with my writing. As I sit here at my desk, typing these very words, I don’t feel the confidence I once felt during the “glory days”–when I was unemployed and dedicated most of my time towards writing.

But all that drastically changed when I returned to my job a few months ago. Rather than enrolling in classes about short stores, I enroll  in classes about being a better teacher. I write lesson plans rather than short stories, and I attend  parent teacher conferences, not literary events. I wish I could say no to these commitments,  but it’s not that easy. One, they are professionally mandatory and two, I love my job. So, naturally it’s difficult for me to scale back.

Yet, I know that if I continue to perform this unbalancing act, I’ll continue to ignore a part of my life that is important to me, and  eventually, in a matter of time,  I’ll be filled with resentment. As a teacher, I’ve learned that it takes drastic effort to see drastic change, which reminds me of one of my favorite rappers, LL Cool J, and  his song, “Mama Said Knock you Out.” In his first line he states,  “Don’t  Call it a Comeback, I’ve been here for years.”  The story behind the opening line has left me with a lasting impression. Supposedly, during a time when LL’s popularity and success were waning and he was having difficulty with the direction in  his writing, it was his grandmother who encouraged him to “knock out” his insecurities and critics. She simply told him to believe in himself and use his time off from music as a motivator. LL wisely took the advice from his grandmother which lead to the birth of  an award winning song, eventually earning him a Grammy. Had it not been for his wise grandmother and time away from his craft, I doubt if the creation of the song we know so well well today would’ve ever been created. Like LL, sometimes we have to step away and hear some tough love to bring us back to our calling.

Today marks the 6th of November, and usually this time of the year is a special time for writers. It’s NaNoWriMo–national writing book month, when individuals pledge to write a 50,000 word novel in 3o days. It’s also NaBloPomo– National bloggers post month– when bloggers post a blog every day of November. If followed with fidelity, these challenges are supposed to encourage writers to elevate their craft of writing and encourage a daily routine. But I see them as LL’s grandmother giving me the encouragement I need in a time where I’ve lost my direction and need help to refocus.

It’s going to be a busy month–besides work, I’m applying for grad school, planning a trip to the Philippines, studying for the GRE, and writing  a book or 30 posts in the month of November are commitments I won’t be able to invest in.  Yet, like I stated earlier, sometimes we need drastic change in order to see drastic results.  In the case of LL Cool J, the drastic advice and hiatus led him to one of greatest songs ever recognized in hip hop music.

Today, despite the odds against me, I pledge to participate in NaNoWriMo, which means I’ll have to write a book in the month of November. It won’t be an easy feat; challenges already lay ahead; for example, I’m six days into the month and I haven’t written anything, which means I’ve lost a lot of valuable time. Yet, I  just have to take the advice of LL’s grandmother– if I continue to feed into the negativity and excuses and allow time to slip away, I won’t be knocking out anyone, including my skeptical self.

So wish me luck, it’s November 6 and the only thing I have written is the title of the book: ‘otherland. If I count the title, then my word count is one. 49,999 words left and 24 days to go. Time to knock it out.

 

 

 

No Filter

I was recently at my mom’s house looking through old family albums. Most of the albums were showing their age, perforated pages breaking, adhesiveness from the glue weakened. Although the photos were discolored, faded and washed out, there was something about being able to touch the pictures, rubbing my finger on the wax and plastic that hit a sentimental chord. No, I was not reminiscing about the people and places in the photos. Instead, I was mourning the photo albums, thinking and wondering about the future of them. I tried to recall the last time I saw someone use a camera, develop film and place pictures in a photo album. I couldn’t help but question if years from now would albums be obsolete, in the same way Poloroid cameras are no longer sold, stamps are declining in sales and Twinkies are off the shelves. It saddened me to think that albums could have the same ill fate as these once valuable commodities.

Maybe it’s because I consider myself a neo luddite—for many years, I refused to purchase a Smart phone, reasoning that my flip phone had the necessary functions that I needed. I owned a typewriter rather than a laptop, and I’m certain that I’m one of the rare people who used a rotary phone as a land line, in the 21st century. Maybe it’s because I’m aging and I refuse to go with the modern times or maybe it’s because I’m too lazy to learn something new. I’d like to think that, at best, I‘m a true romantic– fantasizing about the day when someone will send me a love letter in the mail as opposed to an email or text message. The thrill of typing my next poem on my Underwood typewriter and hearing the ring when I have reached the margin enthralls me much more than the actual sound of my ring tone.The Nintendo 64 on which I play Street Fighter, the Atari joystick I use to play Ms. Pac Man, or on the wooden Tricky Triangle I solve puzzles,these old school games elicit more emotion and satisfaction from me than playing with the latest piece of modern technology.

However, I’m not entirely opposed to all things contemporary. There is definitely a need for technology, especially for our progressive, modern lives. For instance, the concern of being lost is completely resolved thanks to Tom Tom,Garmin or even Siri. We can navigate from point A to B easily, within a blink of an eye, and never have to worry about getting lost and pulling into a gas station to ask for directions. Also, there’s no need to ever go to a library when there’s Nook or ipad. Anyone can read anywhere at any time and, conveniently, people from all over the world can download any book within seconds and purchase the latest copy of their favorite novel without ever setting foot in a bookstore. Or how about being able to communicate with anyone in the world? A person doesn’t need to open his mouth in order to converse. He can send a “like” or “thumbs up” to anyone with a profile and immediately let them know that he approves of what theyre doing, where they’re going, who they’re with, and also what they’re eating. Technology is so vast, robust and encompassing that there is virtually nothing that we can’t do. And this great sense of satisfaction and capability builds a strong and thriving community that has the world, literally, in their fingertips. I mean, the accolades of technology just goes on and on.

But I wonder, in the midst of all these technological advancements, have we forgotten the simplicities of life where we relied on the human capacity rather than the capacity of a computer? For example, what is more impressive than an assured woman knowing her surroundings, with a keen sense of direction, who can easily look up at the sun and know, confidently, which direction is north, south, east or west? Or the person who goes into a book store and purchases a hard back copy of their favorite book, turning actual pages and being able to write or make notes and feel the texture of words of the pages and cover; or being able to smell an old library book and wonder about the homes and hands in which this book was held. That can never be mimicked in any Kindle or Ereader. But most of all, we sometimes forget the power behind good old fashion human interaction. What ever happened to simply picking up the phone and listening to someone’s voice and hearing their reaction to a joke or even a simple “hello”.

Perhaps I’m more of a traditionalist than I want to admit. Perhaps I’m holding on to a past life that has no place in modern times. Perhaps I’m just crazy. But when I’m out with my friends, and everyone is on their phone “checking in” or when conversations are being replaced with texts that end and begin with LOL, that is where I draw the line. There’s a raging fire inside of me that flames every now and then when I know that a copious number of dinners are taking place with people interacting behind cell phones and updating how many “likes” they‘ve acquired on their check in have  or a society communicating in abbreviated messages such as BRB and ❤ and #nofilter.

But I know technology advances year after year, day after day, and minute after minute. Gone are the days of singing telegrams, A tracks and ghetto blasters. There’s nothing I can do about the race for modern revelation nor that I would want to. But my only wish is that as we move forward into new modern terrain that we still remember the things that genuinely define us. And we don’t forget that the human capability is smarter, stronger and more complex than the capability of any mega gig.And we don’t underestimate that the simple and daily exchanges amongst people of a smile, pat on the back or nod will always be more favored than a “like” button or a virtual “thumbs up”. Finally, it’s okay to get lost every now and then because when we rely on our own instincts to guide us, intuition will eventually direct us safely to where we need to go.

Most of all, it would be reassuring to know that years from now, when I’m am old and gray, just like my Underwood typewriter that functions but is past it’s prime, it would be comforting to be amongst people that still hold a strong value in books, paper and library cards. And despite all the ingenious technology that will eventually ensue, I’d like to know that I will live in an innovative world where there will be sentimental love letters in the mail, romantic books on the shelves and maybe, possibly, if I’m lucky, memorable pictures in photo albums.